I Want to Quit (This is What Animal Rescue is Like)
By Joan C. Fremo

I want to quit!
My health is bad. There are days I feel so terrible that I can barely move.
My phone bills are outrageous, and I could have replaced my van with the
funds I have spent these last 3 years---on animals that were not my own.

I want to quit!
I spend hours and hours emailing about dogs. There may be 500 messages when I
start---and at 4 AM, when I finally shut down the computer, there are still
500 emails to be read.

I want to quit!
Gosh, I haven't the time left to email my friends. I can't remember the last
book I read, and I gave up my subscription to my local newspaper---I used to
enjoy reading it, cover to cover, but now it often ends up in the bottom of
the squirrel's cage---unread.

I want to quit!
I've spent days emailing what seems like everyone---trying to find a foster
home, help for a dog languishing in a shelter---but his time has run out, and
the shelter has had to euthanize to make room for the next sad soul.

I want to quit!
I swear, I walk away from my computer to stretch my legs---let the dogs
out---and come back to find another dog in desperate need. There are times I
really dread checking my email. How will I find the funds, the help, to save
yet another dog?

I want to quit!
I save one dog, and two more take its place. Now an owner who doesn't want
his dog---it won't stay in his unfenced yard. An intact male wanders... This
bitch got pregnant by a stray... This 3-month-old pup killed baby chicks...
The dog got too big... This person's moving and needs to give up his pet. I
ask you, friends---what town, what city, what state doesn't allow you to own
a pet?

I want to quit!
I just received another picture, another sad soul with tormented eyes that
peer out of a malnourished body. I hear whimpering in my sleep, have
nightmares for days...

I want to quit!
Many of the "Breed People" don't seem to want to hear about these dogs.
Breeders either don't realize, or just don't care, how many dogs of their
breed are dying in shelters.

I want to quit!
I just got off the phone. "Are you Pyr Rescue? We want to adopt a male to
breed to our female." How many times do I have to explain? I have tried to
explain about genetics, about health and pedigrees. I explain that rescue
NEUTERS! I usually end up sobbing, as I explain about the vast numbers of
animals dying in shelters across the country, as I describe the condition
many of these animals are found in. I wonder if they really heard me...

I want to quit!
It is not like I don't have enough rescues of my own to worry about---but
others have placed dogs improperly and aren't there to advise the new owners.

I want to quit!
There ARE some unscrupulous rescues out there---hoarders, collectors, and
folks who will short change the care of the animals to make a dollar. The
save them all, regardless of temperament, putting fellow rescuer's and
adopters at risk but not being truthful.

I want to quit!
I have trusted the wrong people--- had faith and heart broken...

I want to quit!
AND THEN...
My dog, Magnus, lays his head in my lap, he comforts me with his gentle
presence---and the thought of his cousins suffering stirs my heart.

I want to quit!
AND THEN...
One of those 500 emails is from an adopter. They are thanking me for the most
wonderful dog on earth---they cannot imagine life with out their
friend---their life is changed, and they are so grateful.

I want to quit!
AND THEN...
One of my adopted Rescues has visited a nursing home. A patient that has
spent the last few years unable to communicate, not connecting---Lifts his
hand to pat the huge head in his lap, softly speaks his first words in
ages--- to this gentle furchild.

I want to quit!
AND THEN...
A Good Samaritan has found and vetted a lost baby, "I can't keep him, but
I'll take care of him until you find his forever home."

I want to quit!
AND THEN...
"Jamie took his first steps holding on to our Pyr." "Joan, you should see
this dog nursing this hurt kitten!" "I was so sick, Joan, and he never left
my side..."

I want to quit!
AND THEN...
I get an email from a fellow rescuer, "Haven't heard from you in a
while---you OK? You know I think of you..."

I want to quit!
AND THEN...
A dozen rescuers step up to help, to transport, to pull, and to offer
encouragement. I have friends I have never seen, but we share tears, joys,
and everything in between. I am not alone. I am blest with family of the
heart, my fellow Rescuers.Just days ago it was a friend who shared her wit
and wisdom, whose late night email lifted my heart. Sometimes it is friends
who only have time to forward you a smile. Often, it is my friends who
forward me the notices of dogs in need. There are Rescuers who see a flailing
transport and do everything they can do find folks to pull it together for
you. Rescuers who'll overnight or foster your Dog while you seek transport.
There are Rescuers not used to or comfortable with your breed, but who put
aside their discomfort to help. There are Rescuers whose words play the music
of our hearts. Foster homes that love your Rescue, and help to make them
whole again---body and spirit. Foster homes that fit your baby in, though it
may not be their breed. Rescuers whose talents and determination give us
tools to help us. Rescuers we call on for help in a thousand ways, who answer
us, who hear our pleas. Rescuers who are our family, our strength, our
comrades in battle. I know I cannot save every Pyr in need. I know my efforts
are a mere drop in a sea. I know that if I take on just one more---those I
have will suffer.

I want to quit!
But I won't. When I feel overwhelmed, I'll stroke my Magnus's head while
reading my fellow Rescuers emails. I'll cry with them, I'll laugh with
them---and they will help me find the strength to go on.

I want to quit!
But not today.
There's another email, another dog needing Rescue.

This piece is dedicated, with love and gratitude, to all my fellow Rescuers.
Joan